It was this time last year that my world came crashing in on itself. Rat-race exhaustion and sheer disillusionment with the state of the world left me pretty broken and bruised. I was in a space of panic and anxiety as I packed up my life and took a good look around. What I saw was the remnants of a way of being that did more harm than good.
I was not okay.
What I see now is that my former self had denied herself the process of grief. She was living in denial of her loss and took great measures to escape that reality. The denial seeped into all aspects of my life – from eating, sleeping to sex and alcohol – I deprived myself of a myriad of healthy, normal aspects of life. I engaged in deep meditation and ecstatic dance – questing after an altered state of being as often as I could. Beneath the facade of health and an active lifestyle I was slowly dissolving and fading away.
However, I believe that this story is one of resurrection.
This story has been reclaimed. It is now one of true health – forging positive relationships with food, exercise, passions, vocations and joy.
I hope to share sparkles of the lessons I’m learning throughout this healing journey. I hope that, if you care to join, you enjoy the ride. May this be one of laughter, dancing, tears and forgiveness.